It's always the same thought that comes to mind when the year comes to an end.. I can't believe it.  I really can't. However, I do appreciate all that this year has taught me. So much has happened in the past twelve months and all of it has impacted my life a huge deal. I started off this year pretty rough with one of the toughest loss in my life but it for sure opened my eyes to really see and appreciate life a lot more. Death is inevitable. We all have it coming but we just never really think about it, at least I don't and that may be a good thing because when I do think about death, it scares the shit out of me. So why live in fear? Just live each day the way that you want to live it. Enjoy your time while it is still here.

I know I sure enjoyed this year despite the bad shit. I was able to travel a good deal, which is something everyone should do once in a while. Escape from your daily routine. Escape from your comfortable cocoons. Do something different, try something different. Experience life the way others may see as routine. It really teaches you about a ton of shit you never would have learned by sitting in front of a computer or even reading a book.

I also did quite a few hikes this past year. Never thought of myself to be the hiking type since I hated cardio. I mean I really hated cardio but I was so glad that Elissa introduced me to it. She woke me up on the morning of my birthday and simply said to pack my things because we were going on a trip. It was one of the most memorable moments of 2013 for sure. Being able to escape from everything and get lost off the trails into the mountains was incredible. It sure gave me a new hobby that I try and do as much as possible. Being far away from any Starbucks Wi-fi, life is really different. The air just tastes better when you're out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by fresh water and tall tall trees and sky scraping mountains.

I watched my son turn 5 in 2013. I can not believe how much he has grown and how smart he is. I guess that's something every parent says but shit, there is just no other way to put it. One day he's a small tiny baby who can barely walk and talk, then the next day he's half the size of me, wearing skinny jeans and a tie every day playing Call of Duty better than most adults I know. Being parent is so stressful because it requires so much self sacrifice and I didn't fully understand what it was like until this year because now that he's older and that he can better express his emotions, everything we say and do as parents plays a huge role on their life. So it really pushes us to be the best for them and put on own shit aside. A lot of people question if I am Jayce's real dad. Well it all used to seem so complicated but now, it's really so simple. I am as much of a real dad to Jayce as any person who feeds and clothes his child, who teaches morals and respect to his child, who cares and comforts his child, and who watches them grow day by day and see that I am a role model to his child. 

Most important of all in 2013... I asked Elissa to marry me. There has been so much that her and I have been through that it feels like.. Why haven't we already done this? and I really couldn't tell you any other reason but the fact that I finally came to my senses. I love this girl more than anything and with all the shit that has happened this year, Elissa was the one person who stuck by my side through thick and thin and through the good and the ugly. She always had my back with everything and I could not have ever imagined to be with someone more perfect. A lot of people always say that they will never change for anyone and as respectable as that may sound, how will you ever know that you have met someone that's worth it? I never wanted to change my ways either, I always thought it was about being true and never letting anyone change you but what happens when you find someone worth changing for? You ask her to marry you.

Happy New Years. Let us all live 2014 with meaning and filled with good and fun shit.